“So,… What Do You Like To Do For Fun?”

 So, I’m excited! 😆 

I’m planning on picking-up the koto & will be planting a garden 🪴, soon. I am finding the joy in the slowness of life. The plan is to buy my koto & listen to some music 🎶 on YouTube & find some sheet music & play it outside while my garden is slowly growing.

I am a believer in talking to plants 🌱 & pouring into them. Also, my babies will be in a greenhouse, but I will open them to air as needed. It’s going to be a beautiful experience. As I slowly learn my music, my babies will grow & I will grow. As I learn the koto, it will bring me joy that I took on another instrument at a later age. Such is the beauty of aging. Also, I plan take on the harp 🪉, later, but, the lesson here is pace.

See, the koto lays flat & is beautiful with several different designs & strings. The images on them truly describe the musician’s personality & I love the poetry in it all! 

If you didn’t know, I’m a Sakura fan. 🌸 Cherry blossoms 🌸 are beautiful & depict a stillness of life. Low-key, I have always tried to live a life full of color & stillness. Enjoying my new hobbies & loves in secret, creating a world 🌎 only a secret lover could enjoy. Walk into my house & discover, was always my dream. I learned different arts & did different experiences to speak without breaking a step in public. I am, now, being okay with the knowledge I have, now, & only want to build on it. Make a beautiful life gorgeous, will be my new motto. 

So, I have to work & I learned my sister is going to the Geechee Festival down here. I told her to bring me back our flag, lol 😆. Our grandfather on our Mama’s side came from the Geechee nation. She’s (my sister) always self-conscious of us not having the accent, but, if our family moved, they moved. We can’t help that, lol 😂. Our mother’s maiden name is French, which, down here, means your people most likely came from the Low Country & the slave masters were French. They eventually migrated out of South Carolina & went to the other states. I need to stop playing & do our 23 & me. It was our mother who let us know we were part of the nation, just displaced as hell. Our cousin still talks the dialect & our cousins on that end still make the cuisine.

Anywho, back to what I talking about before the rambling: I can’t  wait to sit outside, with the wind-blowing, playing my koto & watching my plants 🪴 grow, everyday. Incorporating this hobby & starting back into the gym will get me active, creative, & feeling super positive, again, because I’m embracing this slow life. I am still pretty pissed about slowing down, but, sometimes, you need healthy ways to cope. 

As far as music goes, I can sometimes play by ear 👂. Not all the time, but, if I catch a few notes, I can expand on them. A lot of people are always surprised I can do this, but I played the saxophone & piano for a while as a kid & that’s how I learned. Piano lessons were eh,… I always wanted to play the drums, lol! 😂 But, playing instruments taught me a lot about poetry & stream of consciousness thought-processes. Narrating your life against the smooth flows of sound is beautiful. It is also why I used to paint. Each stroke is a sentence on a canvas 🎨. 

When you wake-up everyday, you slowly write ✍️ your story. So, that’s why I chose the koto. The pace you are so supposed to play it & the sound describes my life right now. Finding beauty in the mundane is to find beauty in everything. There is something waiting at the end of this tunnel, but, I am not sure. That’s why when I see someone is trying to be with me & I see their aura isn’t matching mine, I see what I built becoming useless or falling apart. Built as in, they wouldn’t sufficiently be interested in the beautiful things in life & I’d have to live a dreadful, miserable existence with them just to say I have somebody. Ew. Also built as in, alone, I can fall down & pick myself up quickly, but the wrong person can bury you for life. Who wants that type of baggage?! Double ew!

But, in this instance, I am in a good spot to pivot in any direction without obstacles or blocks. This is beautiful, because, now, I have only yet to work & choose. Choose & work,…. And, continue to strive. That’s why, it can be painful to be alone, but, beautiful to be alone & progressing well. So, choose your battle & be one with it. Embrace the slowness of life & develop understanding. You may need to understand someone else’s experience, one day. 💕🪴🌸

I remember watching something & it literally was said, “Death is the Mother of Beauty.” Truer words have not been spoken. Death, indeed, is the Mother of Beauty. Things must die to give way to other beautiful things. Beauty can also be your demise. Like everything else, so is there something called BALANCE. I have learned to appreciate your beauty & preserve what you can, but, realize, your looks die to give way to new looks. Now, people have told me I still look like I’m in my 20’s & sometimes I look my age. It just depends on the day & how I do my hair, lol 😂! But, embrace yourself & love yourself. I am, though, considering very light surgery, but, also know the risks. I just don’t want to ever touch my face, lol 😂 God gave me this for a reason, he just wants me to keep-up maintenance on it, which, even though I kind of fallen off, have been using Korean Skincare for.

Anywho, I think I’m done. It’s 08:58 AM & I’m finna take a beauty nap. 🛌 

Love 💕,

Sapph 🌸☺️